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I work with a MORON!

4018 Views 36 Replies 12 Participants Last post by  Acetechno
I now believe in what Forest Gump said when he said stupid is stupid does. So today I get back to the office from being out in the field today. At work I am the unofficial on site Computer MIS/IT guy. Not cuz I want to but because I can and know how, so I just do it. So I walk in to the back room where the modem and Cisco router switch is. I see this new cat 5 drop going down the wall to the work station for my co-worker ED. I ask what this wire is for and I am told by the office girl that Ed's computer will not get on the Internet, but other than that it seems fine. I ask if he can see the gateway and Ed replies that it is on the wall. I say OK. I mean can you ping it or can you see your network settings or does the computer say network connection disconnected. All he can tell me is IE can not display the websites. So he thinks by having one of my installers make him a new cable this will fix the problem. It does not. So he goes home and get his lab top and gets on the internet with the old cat 5 and the new one as well. This was just today. So since Thursday of last week he has been with out internet and makes no attempt to bring it to my attention. Knowing that his lab top works and all other computers in the office are working Ed comes to the conclusion that someone has F'ed with his computer when he went to the bathroom last Thursday. So as I have been told this, I think to my self, "What ever". So he calls the owner of the company today who is out on vacation up in Washington and has a tizzy fit on the phone all about how he can't get on the internet to chat and check email. Keep in mind Ed is like 53 years old. And dumb as a door nail. I ask If I can sit at his computer and check a few things. He does not say anything. So I just sit down and power off his computer. After it re-boots I connect right to the internet with no problems. I surf around for like a minute and I now have it fixed. So for like 6 days the MORON had never turned it off and back on to re-boot it. I tell him it is fixed and he calls the owner of the company to let him know that I was the one who F'ed with his computer baised on the 5 minutes it took to fix it and got it fixed on the first try. So I must of had first hand knowledge of what the problem was. And do I even get a Thank you, NO! Instead I get blamed for his less than 2% knowledge on how a computer works.

I hate people that can not except personal responsibility for there own actions and blame everybody possible for there own stupidness. So next time he asks for a favor I guess I will be too busy to be the nice guy again. ;D
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hahaha, that's too funny Ace!!!!
that is pretty funny. as an IT individual, i feel your pain, and can completely empathize with your end user story. btw...it's "laptop." ;)
All I can say is "Yup!" I deal with it all the time. Hahahaha The 53 yr old part really hits it home though. and ya, it's spelled laptop cuz you can rest it on you lap when you use it. :)
You guys are funny "Laptop" I did not catch that when I proof read it. Lab top. Now who's the moron??? ;D ;D ;D ;D
I say that Ed should be promoted. The Dilbert Principle holds that companies tend to systematically promote their least-competent employees to management (generally middle management), in order to limit the amount of damage they're capable of doing.

Technology is dominated by two types of people: those who understand what they do not manage, and those who manage what they do not understand.
Hehehe; thanks for a good laugh Ace. That was great. I absolutely go crazy when working with incompetent people that drive me bonkers. Which in my company are the older individuals that are completely computer illiterate (sp?). But thanks again for the good laugh. :D
Too funny. I work with someone like that....and it's not Brittany. ;D
mattmainster said:
Too funny. I work with someone like that....and it's not Brittany. ;D
It's Jan huh?!?!
uphill said:
I say that Ed should be promoted. The Dilbert Principle holds that companies tend to systematically promote their least-competent employees to management (generally middle management), in order to limit the amount of damage they're capable of doing.

Technology is dominated by two types of people: those who understand what they do not manage, and those who manage what they do not understand.

This explains why the assistant manager at my work is in the position he is in.. I knew it!
So today I decided to press my luck a little and said to Ed without addressing him. How is the computer working? No response from him. Then I said hey Ed, is your computer still working and connecting to the internet today? Again no response. I then said, Ed, since your pride is so great and you can not even give me thank you for stepping up, don't ask for any favors from me because the answer will be NO! But now I have figured a way to block his network traffic in the router by blocking his Mac address. So I can turn that on/off at my will and even remotely. So I am a very happy camper. hehehe
Acetechno said:
So today I decided to press my luck a little and said to Ed without addressing him. How is the computer working? No response from him. Then I said hey Ed, is your computer still working and connecting to the internet today? Again no response. I then said, Ed, since your pride is so great and you can not even give me thank you for stepping up, don't ask for any favors from me because the answer will be NO! But now I have figured a way to block his network traffic in the router by blocking his Mac address. So I can turn that on/off at my will and even remotely. So I am a very happy camper. hehehe
Sweet!!!! That's freakin hilarious. You're going to have to give us updates. That's great. LMAO!!!
So today the moron (ED) pleads with the owner of the business to have me do a service call at a customers house we did a home theater for some 3 years ago. I set up his small network in his house for internet, print sharing, and file sharing back in the day. No big deal. Easy stuff. So Ed takes the call early in the week. Tells me today that the customer has some kind of box that needs to get hooked to his TV and to the internet at the same time. So I'm thinking he has a Slingbox that he bought from Best Buy or something. I ask Ed what is this box that has to get attached to his TV? He tells me he does not remember the phone call conversation form this pass Monday. I ask if it is a cardboard box that needs to be taped to the TV. He says NO! I then ask maybe his TV needs to put in a Wash Machine Dryer box and put in storage. So, anyways, not to make this story too long. I get to the customers house and what he wants hooked up is a 4 port wired VPN and also a Wireless Router with the DNS turned off and for me to call the ISP and get them to change from a Dynamic to Static IP. This is stuff we really don't do. This would be like calling a roofing contractor to fix a plumbing leak. I mean after all roofers fix leaks right ;D Well, yes in a since. But Audio companys really don't set up VPN's and the such. Some may do, we just don't. So end result is I had to tell the Customer that we/I don;t really do that. The customer goes off and has a spat that I am waisting his time. I explain that network setup is something we don't do and we especially don't do any VPN or the such. The home owner tells me that he told Ed in detail what was expected. So the box is a VPN switch, the TV is the Computer Monitor, and the the internet is the Router/Modem. I am so glad I am not paid to answer phones at my office. I can see how communications with people can sometimes be hard when you have no clue what they are talking about. You have to remember Ed's network was off line for about a week and never thought to reboot his computer. Come on can we expect him to understand a phone call. Way to go MORON I mean ED!
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Sounds like you really enjoy what you do for a living. Is it always this rewarding?
Who hired Ed Simon?

Seriously, this sounds like a job one of my kids could do. All they have to do is:
  • Sit around all day
  • Eat snacks
  • Complain about this and that
  • Goof around on the computer and screw it up
  • Take phone messages that they get wrong!


;D

So where do my kids apply?
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uphill said:
I say that Ed should be promoted. The Dilbert Principle holds that companies tend to systematically promote their least-competent employees to management (generally middle management), in order to limit the amount of damage they're capable of doing.

Technology is dominated by two types of people: those who understand what they do not manage, and those who manage what they do not understand.
X2- and they still manage to screw that up too. Then they get promoted again, and again till they run the place.
;)

ACE, here's a test for you to give Ed (answers at the bottom)

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend?

4. There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it?







ANS-1 --Open the refrigerator, put the giraffe in and close the door.
(This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.)

ANS-2 -- Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door.
(This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your actions.)

ANS-3 -- The Elephant.
The Elephant is in the refrigerator.
(This tests your memory.)

ANS-4 -- You swim across.
All the Crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.
(This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.)
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uphill said:
;)

ACE, here's a test for you to give Ed (answers at the bottom)

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend?

4. There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it?







ANS-1 --Open the refrigerator, put the giraffe in and close the door.
(This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.)

ANS-2 -- Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door.
(This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your actions.)

ANS-3 -- The Elephant.
The Elephant is in the refrigerator.
(This tests your memory.)

ANS-4 -- You swim across.
All the Crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.
(This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.)

I answered all those incorrectly

1. Chop it into pieces, stuff it in.

2. Burn it to ash, sweep the ash into the fridge.

3. The lion king.. he was hosting it, not attending.

4. Boat.
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